Dedicated to all my loved ones =).
Sometimes in life you just feel happy, yet confused at the same time, and that is precisely what I'm feeling now. I'm precisely feeling confused, lol. (And no, not Geri, I'm always sure of her =P.)
Anyway, it's kinda cute when your Dad (who's quite computer illiterate) tries to video chat with you on MSN. Haha I love my parents =). Sometimes my Mum will lose her temper because I lose my temper at her for being a real computer newbie, but well, it's always funny when I think about it. I've come to appreciate how wonderful my parents are =).
When everything is done and over, some people will be smiling in the background, although their own wishes might not have been fulfilled, they're nonetheless happy for their friends who have fulfilled theirs. Sadly, some people accept that it's their fate to forever remain in the background. I say, go forward, go and take what is rightfully yours. Happiness is rightfully everyone's. Reach out your hand and grab it. Do you seriously think your friends are all blind people who can't see your sadness? They might not always be able to read you, but true friends are always able to sense that little bit of something that is not right. I'll always be wishing for your happiness.
One more thing, some mistakes can happen over and over again, but there're opportunities that only happen once in your life. How do you know when those opportunities come along? I don't know, either, but I know I've taken some risks before, only to regret. But the ones that I've taken and NOT regret, they're priceless. Sometimes I think these things make life worth living that much more. Words can't describe how thankul and grateful I am for some of these risks that worked out.
I've been doing some self-reflection recently, and I think I like what I see in the mirror. LOL. Alright, seriously, I have. I was on some website the other day, I think it was the Art Of Manliness, and in one of their articles there was a paragraph that said something like, "People nowadays are so busy finding themselves, that they've no time to commit to anyone else." These words jumped right at me. Now I realise why. Perhaps a life is only worth living if it's for the sake of others (BUT ALWAYS HAVE YOUR OWN DREAMS!) Like, for your family, for your friends, for the love (of your life), etc. That way, there's always something to be happy about. Of course, pessimists will say there's always something to be sad about. It's your choice, really. Being happy would not help you achieve anything, neither will being sad. But by being happy you can do things on a more positive note, and maybe, somebody may just fall in love with your smile. Or some close friend might just feel happier because of you. Or, whatever. You get the message.
With that being said, I still find it a constant challenge to smile sometimes. Although most people will think I'm always joking and all, those who're really close to me will know I'm quite far from that actually. I guess we're all hypocrites sometimes. Anyway, I'm not going to let lame and stupid things bother me anymore. Whining doesn't solve any problems at all, although I enjoy whining to, and listening to Geri's whinings sometimes, just for the fun of it. Being with her is simply awesome =).
Perhaps 2 years in army, and the sudden transition to university has made me a rather indifferent person (when it comes to school and social life in general), I don't really care. What I do care, and am affected by, is that sometimes I tend to let these things affect me personally, which in turn affects my loved ones. And that is not going to happen anymore, hopefully.
Again, wishlist, to-do list, whatever, after my exams:
- Work out
- Catch up with the dearest people to me
- Take Geri to some place she really wants to go (at least one of them)
- Stop being so lazy
- Be a better person
- Smile more often
You know what's the best part? I'm actually smiling while typing this entire post. Maybe something in me has changed. Smile, as in, really, smile from your heart, because there's always something worth smiling for. Definitely. There has to be. Screw the facade.