20060413

Whatever

I've been listening to Silverstein a lot lately (thanks to Gregory for introducing them to me), and I can really relate to a lot of their songs. They do not necessarily reflect my current state, but looking back on the past few years or so, these songs seriously strike a chord in me. Death Cab For Cutie's a pretty good band too, with really amazing songs =).

I don't know why I'm blogging, I just felt like writing something. Life's going good on the surface, but I think there's a lot of shit within me that I've to settle soon (before my NS). I'm still pretty worried for a lot of things, especially with regards to my family. I don't know how I'm supposed to enjoy NS when I've worry about my sister's relationship with my parents everyday. I'm tired of many things, really. Since the day I stepped into TP, I've never really had much time to stop and think. Think about things that are happening. Even if I had, I seldom found the answers. TP was one hell of a rollercoaster ride. I've met some people whom I can proudly say will remain lifelong friends. I've also met some people that made me wonder what friends really are for. People who'll get you into the deepest shit, and disappear, leaving you to take all the blame. The sad thing is most of them don't realise, or admit it. They only care for themselves. They only want to avoid trouble.

Have any of you have ever watched "Monster" the anime or read the manga? Inside this story there's a character called Johan. It's a really good story, and I think Johan's not entirely wrong all the time. With a world that sick, obviously you would want to destroy everything =).

I think I can understand why people choose to become hermits. Why bother facing all these bullshit when you can choose to face nothing at all? Appreciate nature as it is, stop the noise pollution... I generally dislike noise and crowds. I find them irritating. It makes me hot-tempered, it spoils my mood. I guess I'm pretty anti-social deep inside.

I'm also worried for Geri. She's starting school soon, and I really hope she does well =). According to our promise, she's supposed to do better than me in her studies =)! Haha =P. Idiot =P. Anyway, I can't exactly be there for her during her examination period, as I'll be in NS. She's weak physically as well, always falling sick =(. So to Geri, if you're reading this, please take care of your health! I know you'll excel in your studies =)! I'll be here, there, anywhere cheering you on =P! *hugs*

I know I've yet to complete "The Past 3 Years", but I'll complete it as my graduation approaches, I promise =). There's just so little time left, yet so much I want to do. I'm probably going to be in deep shit later on (around 10.30AM), as Willie and I have to face a certain person. Why? Because we've yet to do what we were supposed to do. Willie's trying really hard, and I can barely help due to the FOC and many other personal stuff. Sorry =(. Willie's one of those really helpful people, so helpful most people will take them for fools, for granted. Which sadly, seemed to be the case during his TP life. Somehow he never seems to mind. No idea why =). But it's great to see someone that helpful.

Good night =).

The effort you put in is equalled only by your failures
Why try so hard, when you always end up failing?
Maybe you should stop pushing yourself
Set yourself free and see what you have become
Let yourself go and drift into eternal bliss

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